Tuesday, June 9, 2009

What Do I Know of Holy?



I am in love with this song by Addison Road. I had heard it once on the radio, but my friend Sara asked me about it today and we listened to it again. It instantly brought me back down to a place of being broken and humble. The lyrics are so true of my life. The last few weeks the group that I am going to Haiti with in July has been playing a question/answer game on facebook. It's been so much fun getting to know my teammates this way. I have a much better idea about each of them. Their hurts, struggles and pains and also their joys and strengths. It's been a great time! Anyway, the point of telling you that is not just to rub in how cool they are (which they are ;) lol) but to bring up last week's question. I still have not answered it, partially because I wasn't able to keep up with the thread as it became overwhelmingly large very quickly. And partially because I *didn't have to time to* (*=laaaame excuse). Here is the jist of the question for last week (asked by our leader)...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Forget everything I have told you. I still do not want you to have expectations on this trip, but be open to the Spirit's leading and understand it is God's agenda and not ours.
A. That being said, if you COULD determine the outcome of this trip, what would you consider a successful trip?
We all have expectations even though we don't usually verbally express them. So,
B. What are you hoping to accomplish on this trip. It may be something you want to do for the Haitians, it may be something you hope will happen in your life, or both. Be honest."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The first part of the question I don't have trouble answering at all. I don't have expectations other than just building relationships with the Haitians and allowing those relationships to grow. That we will be able to share our faith and only source of joy and hope with them. That they will in turn cling to faith and grow in it, showing others (I guess that also answers the first part of the second question). But, for some reason the second part of the last question was harder for me to answer. Obviously I want it to affect me somehow. I honestly don't think you could take a trip there and not be affected by it in one way or another. But I still didn't have my answer, I wasn't sure what exactly to hope for or what I wanted to happen in my life. Each trip has been do different and affected me so differently. But, I knew when I heard this song and read the lyrics. So much of it brought me back down to a place of humility. I feel like it speaks exactly for me when answering the question what I hope to accomplish. Here are the lyrics...

What Do I Know of Holy? by Addison Road
I made You promises a thousand times
I tried to hear from Heaven
But I talked the whole time
I think I made You too small
I never feared You at all No
If You touched my face would I know You?
Looked into my eyes could I behold You?

(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?

I guess I thought that I had figured You out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save
Those were only empty words on a page
Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees

(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?

(CHORUS 2)
What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of wounds that will heal my shame?
And a God who gave life "its" name?
What do I know of Holy?
Of the One who the angels praise?
All creation knows Your name
On earth and heaven above
What do I know of this love?

(CHORUS)
What do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of Holy?

What do I know of Holy?
What do I know of Holy?


I want to come out of this trip more broken than I was going in. To be so much in awe of Him. I see so much beauty in the Haitians, Christ's love for them. But still, so much of my life is lived out like the first part of the second verse. Sometimes I think I have Him figured out. I know what to talk about, and can sing about how He is might to save. But what do I really know about that? If I think I have it all figured out, then they are empty words, they're not His words, but my words. If He tried to speak through someone else in Haiti to me, would I recognize it? This last year I feel like I have been so stretched in my faith and grown so much, but I've allowed myself to become arrogant in that. To the point where I allow myself to think I know the answers, but like she says, "What Do I Know of Holy?" Nothing! I feel like I can't even express my answer to the question completely...but that these lyrics speak them for me. I hope that this makes sense! At this point I feel like I'm just rambling! Hope you enjoy the song and that it speaks to you.

37 comments:

Diane said...

This song is so beautiful! I have so much love for you Tiff and for your dad. I talk to God about you and your family often and I know He is holding you in His loving arms. It is through the trials in life that God molds us more into His image... maybe that's why the Haitian people are so beautiful - all they have is trials it seems.

I love you my friend and look forward to another trip to Haiti with you! I can't wait to see what God does on this one!!! :)

Mari said...

Tiffany - this is a beautiful post! You put your thoughts and desires into words so well. I didn't know you had a blog and will be coming back here. I have a few blogs - you are welcome to visit me there!

Katie said...

I have never heard this song but it is beautiful! I am going to post it on my blog today. Let me know the specific dates of your Haiti trip and I will be praying for you and the team!!

Chad and Tammy said...

Wow . . . I have tears in my eyes after reading the lyrics of that song. Thanks for posting it.

Anonymous said...
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I begin on internet with a directory